It was evening in Texas and dark outside, but she flashed her phone towards Teether Hall to show us the best glimpse we could get of the dorm that we met and started our friendship in. It was blurry and grainy and hard to make out the details, but in that moment it instantly took me back 10 years to my first year as a college student in Waxahachie, Texas. I felt as if I could walk into the door and enter the building and go about my college life like I was just there.
It was just a quick clip over our favorite video chatting app, Marco Polo. But as I saw it flash across my screen, an overload of emotions ran over me! I loved college! LOVED it! I was a shy 18 year old girl who loved being at home with my parents and close friends, but torn with also always loving the idea of attending college. I always had a passion for World Missions and knew that going to Bible College would give me the perfect opportunity to test the waters and see if that was something I wanted to pursue further. I knew I would have the opportunity to study music in a deeper way like I wanted to. And I also knew that attending Bible College would really push me to learn more about my Christian faith. It didn’t hurt that it was the same college Jon was attending as well!! 🙂
College was everything I thought it wold be and then some! When I walked onto the campus for the first time, I had no idea that I would make lifelong friends there – but I certainly did! I had no idea that I would muster up the courage to write a speech and stand up on a stage in front of a brand new school and persuade them to vote me into student council. I’m the shy one, remember?! I especially didn’t think I would be brave enough to interview with the dorm pastor to be a Resident Assistant for the second floor of Teeter Hall. But what I know now is that I’m so glad that I did!
Remember I said that I was the shy girl. The introvert. The one who hated and still hates confrontational situations! I’ll be honest that the idea of having an entire dorm room to myself with my own private bathroom was a huge enticement!! But becoming an RA was the best thing for me in college and still something that I’m incredibly thankful that I did. It grew me in so many ways. I lead girls in nighttime devotionals once a week. I got to hear their stories and serve them all the while they were serving me and building me up and growing my confidence. I got to help and encourage them. And…every now and then, I had to dress code them. “Your dress or skirt isn’t reaching your finger tips when your hands are at your side…? Back in the dorm! Go cover yourself!”
I know, I know! But it was my job! If I didn’t dress code them then I got into trouble and there was no way I was going to let that happen!! But they all forgave me and we laughed about it after they rolled their eyes at me! 🙂
Unfortunately, I can still smell the greasy cafeteria if I try hard enough! I can smell the music building that I walked into first thing every morning for my 8:00 am music theory class. I can envision my walk from there to main building for chapel each morning where I had the awesome opportunity every day to worship the Lord among all of my friends and professors. I can also still picture the cracks in the cement that made up the sidewalks known as the Prayer Walk on campus that Jon and I frequently walked around. Three times to be exact! Why three times? Because tradition said that if you walk around it three times holding hands with your boyfriend/girlfriend then you’ll end up marrying them.
That’s bible college for ya, guys! Guess they were right about that one though! 🙂 And I loved every single bit of it.
I couldn’t have asked for a better college experience. The only thing I could ask for, is for more time to live more of my college life. When I saw the clip of my old dorm building pop up across my screen, I surprised myself at the sense of pride I still felt for my old dorm and college. I haven’t been there in eight years, but seeing that immediately put me back in that place. I started reflecting back on everything that came out of my experience as a college student and also found myself in tears remembering wishing at times that I was onto the next phase in life. That I was out of 8 o’clock classes. That I was past the time in my life of eating meals in a gross cafeteria where nothing ever sounded good and the food often looked questionable. Wishing I was already married and a mom and living that dream life. I am proud of myself because I did take full of advantage of college and I did things I never once would have thought I would have the courage to do – and for that, I am proud.
I’d like to go back and tell my 19-year-old self to slow down walking through the halls and take in a little bit more of everything that was going on around me. To go to that basketball or football game even if I didn’t have make up on or feel cute and put together. But go to it and enjoy it and take the time to pause and look around at all the friends sitting around me and all the school spirit that I was there supporting out on the field.
The dark blurry image of my old dorm also challenged me even now to live in the moment. To soak up every bit of every day. To grow and thrive in the seasons where we find ourselves now. Continuing to work towards our goals and dreams, but making the absolute most of where we find ourselves right now. Because in six months, or a year, or three years from now it’s all going to look so different. And I want to be able to look back and be proud of myself for living it up in the life we have now!
Not wishing for more.
Not wishing for less.
But doing the most with what we have in front of us now, and being intentional so that we don’t look back and say, “I wish we would have…”
PS – digging around for these photos we realized that these were taken pre iPhone! Wow things have come a long way!!
LOVE!!!